Updated: Apr 7
Nothing is perfect in this universe. This comes as news to no one. But what may surprise people is that our universe exists only because of its imperfections.
“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn't exist.....Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist” said Stephen Hawking.
So chill out and forget the statement that you strive for perfections. You should be striving for progress. It's not the perfections that makes the whole. How can we strive for something unknown. How can you tell what you actually are striving for. Be careful what you wish for.
But this is not what I wanted to talk to you about. Many of us think of themselves as they are not good enough.
We are all born the way we meant to be. Clean canvas. And then shit happens and we start doubting our whole existence. Maybe you have some legitimate reasons for doubting yourself. Or maybe you can’t stop the inner voice from repeating all the stuff the naysayers have told you your whole life. Either way, you can’t seem to get past the bullshit in your brain. The nasty monologue just won't turn off. It keeps telling you how broken, stupid, useless, ugly and unimportant you and your dreams are. That voice seem to know everything about you and it takes a sadistic pleasure in reminding you of every flaw, in every part of your life.
There is only one thing what it forgets to mention. Who you really are.
I spent most of my life asking myself, “Who am I? Who am I to be a coach? Who am I to teach others? Truthfully, the voice in my head that uttered those words to me, so often, sounded much more mean. And they came out more like, “Who the fuck are YOU?”
The secret fear that I’ve carried since being a young child is that I’m ‘worthless’—which meant I constantly showed up trying to ‘prove’ myself to others starting with my parents, my friends, my teachers, my husband, and my superiors . It didn’t matter who I was, I did whatever I could to attain the approval. I tried to dress the right way, say the right things and do what it took. I have learned how to look good. But it wasn't enough. Inside I still felt like there is something broken. So I was pretending to be someone else. Except it was painful. I rarely got the approval I sought. And even if I did it felt disgusting because I wasn’t being myself anyway.
There is two things in life we need to know.
1. What are we up against
2. What do we have going for us.
Nothing else matters, the rest will come.
Being tough on yourself, especially when you've gone in the wrong direction, can make you stronger. Own your worse enemy - who is you. Be authentic, don't try to be someone else. If you follow steps of other successful and happy people you will probably fail. Everyone has a different story and different things helped them to achieve the utter happiness within themself. When tragedy strikes or you struggle with something you don't need to search for the answer on how to deal with it in books. Search within yourself... the powerful person that you are. How can you access that? At times when life is good and you feel really blissful. Go back to your past and uncover your lessons. Your past is who you are today and it took you to the moment where you are right now. Close your eyes and think how much you have grown for the past 5-10 years. How many challenges you've already overcome. Everyone of those experiences brings value to your life. You are amazing. You have come through so much. You are strong. Accept yourself.
Own the powerful motherfucker that you are. You are unique and it's beautiful. Your life experiences taught you a lesson, you have never failed, it was all needed to develop a strong individual. Own the impact you have on others. And own the difference you make. Be confident.
Don't listen to your sadistic subpersonality that judges and devaluates you.. your inner critic is an asshole and it's time to break up.